I'm Just Crystal

How many cares one loses when one decides not to be something but to be someone...

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Finally Official!

I finally have a start date in Atlanta! I will begin my new position on Monday, November 28th and my last day here at the Virginia office will be Thursday, November 10. While I'm excited to go home, I'm even more sad about leaving. I think I've had more fun the last month here than I've had my entire two years here. I'm going to miss my kids (definitely) and a boat load of friends and co-workers. I keep telling myself, this isn't permanent. I'm no stranger to packing up and leaving so if Atlanta isn't treating me well, I'll be back before you can say "MOJITO."

...now all the craziness begins!

Sunday, October 16, 2005

Chemistry vs. History

Chemistry is the science of matter and its interactions with energy and itself. Because of the diversity of matter, which is mostly in the form of atoms, chemists often study how atoms interact to form molecules and how molecules interact with each other. It's also a colloquialism for how people relate to each other.

The term history comes from the Greek "ιστορία" historia, "an account of one's inquiries" or continuum of events occurring in succession leading from the past to the present and even into the future, which would lead one to believe that past and past interactions can be an astute indicator of things to be.

And then I started thinking about relationships...

When you're in a relationship, what's more important chemistry or history? Even more important, what happens when they're derived from separate sources? Chemical reactions happen all around us: when we light a match, start a car, eat dinner or walk the dog. A chemical reaction is the pathway by which two substances bond together. In relationships, this chemical reaction manifests itself it many forms both negatives and positives. The "zsa zsa zsu" (the unsmart term for "chemistry" as heard on “Sex and the City”) can turn friends into lovers and conversely lovers into enemies... make the ordinary extraordinary and the fabulous and the remarkable, routine.

Enter the reigning champion: History.

It would be imprudent to underestimate the contentment and necessity of complacency brought only by time and tried & true methods… Oooh the joys of not having to conceal quirks, obsess over a misplaced strand of hair or apply lip gloss immediately upon waking up. There something so endearing about a well-hugged teddy bear or jeans that conform to you derrière or a shoe that no one else can wear quite like you. And while reliability and safety are usually thought to be positive attributes of minivan, in a relationship they’re necessary.

Is it possible to maintain the spontaneity and freshness of a relationship and still find that necessary contentment? And if not, which is more important? Anyone who knows me knows I’m not a “relationship person” (if there should be such a thing). I’m feisty, impetuous, perfectionist, independent and have recently been described as “emotionally cold”… not the traits of a relationship person. But the question remains, what do you do when the zsa zsa zsu (from quite possibly the absolute wrong person) begins to thaw out your heart and opens your mind to a new and scary possibility?

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Reaffirmation of Humanity

I'm always looking for that thing to make me believe that all is not lost in the world; something to make me want to bring life into this world... these confirmations come in the smallest of deeds - a young man giving up his seat on the Metro to an elderly woman; a driver yielding so that I can merge on I-66 and today, someone find my debit card, calling the 800 number on the back to block it and then bringing it to the Fairfax County Police Department.

Every liquid asset I have in this world (checking and savings account) were linked to that card, not to mention I get paid once a month and pay day was three days ago!

As I frantically called Bank of America, I imagined someone on a shopping spree, or even worse, filling up their gas tank with my hard earned pennies and began to cry. Once the Bank of America Associate came on the phone, and after several long pauses informed me that my card had been found, blocked and turned into the police, I found myself crying again.

It's really not so bad, eh?

The "UGHHH" Heard Around the World

It's been a while since I've blogged... not since I've entered my mid-20's to be exact! So far, so good -- I feel older, wiser, more mature, blah blah blah. Actually, I've found myself not-so-eager to share my age. I used to spew my age of 23 like it was a badge of honor. For whatever reason, that sense of personal and professional accomplishment that I had at 23-years-old has dissipated. I used to feel like I was pretty far ahead of the early 20's curve and with the change of a day, I feel mediocre, at best. Did I peaked at 21? Damn.

Other than feel subpar in certain areas of life, the lore of the last few weeks has been my impending move to Atlanta. A few weeks ago my company stopped just shy of packing my bags for me. Found a project in Atlanta. Gave me a target date [Oct. 11]. Never mentioned it again? Whatever.

If you can't tell; I'm not big on words lately. In fact, I've only been interested in watching "Sex and the City." I bought myself the complete series for my birthday and I can't seem to turn them off. There's got to be a support group for this kind of thing. It's so bad that I'm going to Manhattan just to take the 3-hr Sex and the City tour. Am I living vicariously through Carrie, Charlotte, Samantha and Miranda? I sure as hell hope not because they aren't real.

What else? Oh, the crush (since that's the only thing people ask me about these day) As of late, this crush has soared to unchartered heights of absurdity and everybody knows but him. Now I have a tangible foundation for this attraction. On top of being adorable, he has an actual personality - I didn't always think that was the case. After a few great conversations, I've concluded that there has to be something wrong with him and/or he has a girlfriend so...

Wow. Can't believe there's nothing else to blog about...

Go Redskins?